on the night of friday the thirteenth:

: through heathkid, i was recommended to 'ted's'. a swinky swanky poshy restaurant in new york. i didn't have to do much and most times i was babysitting bratty japanese kids. or having to sit with old desperate rich chinese women. the menu wasn't too great but the kitchen was amazing. a chinese man in his 40s, mr sim, a customer, then proposed to me, despite him being married already. he was a math teacher who had a great sense of humour and i was scared and flattered at the same time. (???!) i lived near ted's and the monorail ride home was amazing. going through a surreal city and parks with bookshop/cafes in the middle where people could read and at the same time pick up any piece of fabric available on the shelves and make their own craft. :

who's ted? i don't knowww ted...

le sigh...

dreams about work.
dreams about people from work.
dreams about me at work.
dreams about the same dreams.
this is getting boring.

perhaps i should start listening to music again just before slumber.
perhaps.

changing times and moving on.
but it's still the same.
i haven't changed.

and it's good to constantly be deciphered.
and still prove them wrong.

xox

from across the way.
5 hours away.

: part I. walked into town barefoot in my comadre shirt and my non-existent black reebok shorts. fascination with free origami handouts at the back of borders and met up with cayangcat and suragani. and we went to world of sports and checked out shoes and by that time i already had slippers on. part II. went to a goth club and checked out bad electro-clash on a really bad stereo and all the freaks had really bad makeup on. :

listen to ritchie valens.

work. and work.
and performances and teachers.
and plays and recitals.
and students. and work.

i'm sure i could have better dreams than those.

---

and i have this dammit janet song (from the rocky horror show) stuck in my head.
so not funny.

dreams of paranoia.
dreams of rashes.
dreams of dreams and everything in between.

work has been good.
health has been no good.
i am not complaining.

as of 02022007, gryswtr@blogspot.com is 5 years old. presents are very much welcome.
alternatively you can send me an email or sign the guestbook by clicking on the word 'contact' to your left.

listen to material girl by madonna.

---> (of 05jan07)
"never mix it with black tea", she said, and when you're just about to collapse into slumber, the invisible finger switches your mind on. inhaling the nicotine strongly, absorbing the air around you with strange fondness. and she was friendly for the first hour. making conversation and feeling a little too confident. crashing the final hours with a splitting headache and it had to rain at the precise moment. luck was on her side when she met her lover and they held hands throughout the nite...
<---

where art thou's dreams?
my new bed and mattress are horrible and giving me backaches. hence lately, for the first few minutes of wake-ness, instead of reminiscing, i end up cursing and worrying about my spine more than anything else. but constantly reminding myself, this is only temporary. and the new abode will come before i know it.

blue oyster cult still...

: i ran away from him because he said something silly. perhaps i was sensitive and overreacted. but perhaps he shouldn't have said it in the first place. and i ran so fast. in that strange park. and almost fell off a cliff. he almost caught up with me. it was cold and i was shivering, trembling, my heart racing. surrounded by moss, weeds and emptiness. and i managed to get out of that maze. and stumbled my way up a double decker bus. he never found me but he sent me a text message. an apology. :


dreams are constantly shattered over and over.
how often do i glue back the pieces?
soon these pieces will crumble and fade.
and these dreams are no more.
believe in nothing and achieve nothing.


i don't know.
i don't know what to know.
oh hello kind stranger. please hold my hand and lift me up.