: part I. dgn brought me out to dinner . a vegetarian restaurant floating on the sea. gks was late but she made it nonetheless and it was awesome to see her again. even if it was in a dream. part II. some charity event at a madrasah / orphanage organized by my parents. meal served was seafood but it was not nice and i had to pay for it and i went away to a jetty and had seafood somewhere else. part III. led a tour to ancient chinese museums to old chinese ladies. one of them kept holding my arm but whenever her daughter was in the vicinity, she pretended like she had no clue who i was. part IV. a sleep spa. there were about four double beds. two of them were occupied by couples. the bed was was sprinkled with rose petals and chocolates and candy. you could somewhat 'rent' the bed and sleep in it for any time you please. but i doubt copulation was allowed. :

they have taken a slight turn.
focusing on a single character.
starting with dgn and her adventures with a person she was none less interested in. followed by elw and ih(from high school). do i mean something to them or a drawer just fell out from one of my memory wardrobes? spilling contents. displaying them all over.

it's the weekend and it doesn't feel like it.

listen to language of flowers.

last nite at my parents' house.
: did a 'metal' themed zine named 'dystopia' and distributed it at a toy fair. the featured article was 'the basic recipe of a processed baby'. :

there were more to it but i can't remember now.
still, it's better than dreaming about boring stuff like people you know and can't be bothered to care or deal with.

listen to heather.

NEW DECADES

numbers dictate pretty much every movement we make.
action.
direction.
whether we like it. or not.

and it is okay.

as long as you're still inhaling.
still existing.
still a memory in someone else's memory bank.
still scratching a surface on someone else's page.
friction versus friction.
as long as you're still exhaling.

to dictate and be dictated.
the numbers will always surround you.
and encompass you.
until time is up.

choose your own fucking adventure.

p.s. happy tenth birthday gryswtr. and may there be many more tens to come.

axe-oh-ex.

all hopes and promises are just temporal makeovers.
with water, they flow away.
wash away.
drain away.
there may be traces of stains.
but stains are not nice to look at.
not worth remembering.

instead.

they remind you of how ugly you really are.

hopes and promises are just ugly truths to cover up ugly moments.
to make ugly moments beautiful and lead on to more hopes and dreams.

dreams.
...
what dreams?

gryswtr is getting old.
getting older is not a problem.
it's healing old wounds and facing new ones that is.

unstitch thyself.

not being able to sleep is one thing.
having your heart racing at a million miles an hour is another.
45 minute naps at every interval with bizarre dreams can be really tiring.
all i could ever think of was sedatives and a syringe to go through my heart.

now that i'm awake...
i just want all of this to go away.
give me back my life.

listen to the truth spitting in your face.

xox

: mother planted strawberry stems in a vase outside my house and instead of pouring water, she poured milk. very odd, yes. :

in the past, dreams have been about crazy people doing ridiculous things. people that i do not want to remember or be remembered by. stop invading my dreams, you fuckers! i have other things to think about!

listen to the news and believe naught.

xox