i hate my computer and i want to die.

addendum: i don't feel like dying anymore but i still hate my computer. but not as much as i did earlier. and i hate its recent psychological and physical effects on me. and that affects me in ways more than one. i have started to pay more attention to my notebook and giving it more notice. however, i have not been bold enough to make the first move. typical me. unless i'm at the edge of a cliff and someone says tick tock.

my dreams are not as vivid except for the time where i was taught how to make french toast using peanut butter and salt.

"...looking forward to living forever..."

: last day of high school before finals. had to watch a performance in the school hall. some girl tripped over the stage, spinning around in her sari and no one gave a damn. was annoyed with some kid from another class who kept bothering me. a lift home from a classmate and discovered that bothering kid was my neighbour. overly anxious with finals because i had not been studying physics nor chemistry. met another classmate in the bus and we talked about midgets. i said that midgets were just like us and they did 'normal' things and they had'normal' feelings and he said his dad was a midget. some other kid told him that his mom was then 'scare white' and he got an absolute beating for that. too much blood in the bus. then i ran home to watch spiderman. :

then i woke up.

listen to paul dempsey.