once upon a moment, digits and letters held meaning in a heart. but a two headed king called time made meaning better and worse and constantly altered it. meaning constantly weighed on scales to find its balance. the digits and letters clutched to whatever memory that remained and painted facades over and over again so that the heart would not be empty. for an empty heart was pointless and had no reason to survive anymore. time would test and conquer and defeat uncontrollably. however, a masked heart will one day reveal itself and the digits and letters will crumble victoriously buried in the moment. the heart will thus be empty but there are stains to remind it of what remained before. heart will consult the mind and the mind will give never ending solutions and options.
a damaged heart is not a dead heart.
it is only wounded to be revived and resuscitated.
for new digits. for new letters.
a resurrection will be held ceremoniously.
but only on time's terms and conditions.
will the heart ever dare to place another signature?
maybe and maybe not.
xox
Friday, January 08, 2010
Friday, January 01, 2010
all housed up
some days ago :
: i had an option of three houses. in no order, there was an apartment in prahran, melbourne australia and while it was convenient, i felt that i'd be far away from my family. then there was a really huge house with big colourful rooms but everything was hidden behind closets and secret pathways...it was like living in a pop-up card. finally, a decent house but couldn't step in because it already belonged to someone else. :
last nite :
: 1. a travelling cult who just arrived in malaysia got my number and wanted me to come over. my family and i were ready to call the authorities but before i could get the exact location of where they were, the phone line cut us off. the lady who called was dressed in white and i somehow imagined her floating above a lily pad in the middle of a lake in the middle of nowhere.
2. new house. the basement was where it was at! the sprites loved it and it was their playroom and then he moved in and it became his room. but the sprites continued playing there in the day. there were five televisions but only one remote. *switch* same scene but i had to entertain visitors from abroad and infidelity almost took place but i did not feel guilty at all. :
woke up staring at the wall...mouthing out these words...
"where is the faith?"
we all hope and we all care and we want difference.
there will be difference.
but only if you want to.
i need to.
xox
: i had an option of three houses. in no order, there was an apartment in prahran, melbourne australia and while it was convenient, i felt that i'd be far away from my family. then there was a really huge house with big colourful rooms but everything was hidden behind closets and secret pathways...it was like living in a pop-up card. finally, a decent house but couldn't step in because it already belonged to someone else. :
last nite :
: 1. a travelling cult who just arrived in malaysia got my number and wanted me to come over. my family and i were ready to call the authorities but before i could get the exact location of where they were, the phone line cut us off. the lady who called was dressed in white and i somehow imagined her floating above a lily pad in the middle of a lake in the middle of nowhere.
2. new house. the basement was where it was at! the sprites loved it and it was their playroom and then he moved in and it became his room. but the sprites continued playing there in the day. there were five televisions but only one remote. *switch* same scene but i had to entertain visitors from abroad and infidelity almost took place but i did not feel guilty at all. :
woke up staring at the wall...mouthing out these words...
"where is the faith?"
we all hope and we all care and we want difference.
there will be difference.
but only if you want to.
i need to.
xox